Some parents flinch when they hear the word bedtime. When they see the clock heralding that time of day that all parents know as bedtime, they feel like groaning out loud. But bedtime can be a truly enjoyable part of your day.
I have always loved putting my children to bed, and even now when there are seven of them, there are so many things about this time of day that I enjoy. And I'm not talking about anything altruistic here, just plain personal pleasure.
1. It's a structured part of the day. You know exactly what to do. There's no more "What should we do now?" Settle in for blessed routine.
2. It's a time when you get to groom your kids - and you get to see them stay that way at least until they wake up the next morning. It's the time to take sticky, dirty kids and transform them with soap, water, clean underwear and pajamas. Stop and take a good look at your clean-faced children, and touch their soft, clean hands and silky, combed hair. Pure pleasure!
3. It's an opportunity to focus on each kid individually. Even if you can't focus on each child every day, you can focus on at least one or two. And being able to pay attention to one child at a time is plain pleasure.
4. It's a chance to effortlessly get your kids to talk to you. Now when they're relaxing in bed, and there's nothing more interesting to do than go to sleep, they'll answer your questions about their day and about their lives with much more than the one-syllable replies you often get when they come home from school. You don't even have to ask anything. Just sit next to them, and the words will flow.
5. Putting my children to bed means enjoying the kinds of activities I like. Instead of dishes, laundry, homework, and other housekeeping and childrearing tasks, I can relax with a child on a comfortable bed. I can read them stories, hear them read to me if they prefer, talk or just hug, kiss, rub their back, or hold their hands as their day ends. It's the time for "I love you" and "thank you so much for your help today" and "I really liked when you did xxx," and so on. Sometimes if I'm really exhausted, I might catch a few minutes of shut eye myself.
I know that bedtime can also bring with it conflicts and frustrations. I won't say that it's always easy to get those kids into bed. But if you don't dread this time of day, and actually enjoy it, your positive feelings will pass on to your children, and they will start enjoying bedtime too.
